Thankful

Wow. It has been a REALLY long time since I posted! So much has changed! We lived through a pandemic (well, almost), my grandchildren are much bigger, Lucy started and completed Kindergarten, Linda passed away--unbelievable! I just haven't felt like writing. I'm still having lots of pain. Much of it is the terrible headaches I have, but I also have a lot of back pain now. But my scans are still good. One of my doctors even said I'm doing "weirdly well"--my first official weird diagnosis! 

Because of the pandemic, I've been able to do telehealth visits with my doctors. I've had my scans done here in Huntsville and then zoom with them. However, I had my first visit with my breast cancer doctor in February and will have one with my brain cancer doctor in October. They're both so amazed at how well I'm doing. However, I know why I am--it's because of the Great I AM!! For some reason, He is still using me. Only He knows my expiration date. When it's time for me to go Home, that's when I'll go! And I can't wait to bow at His Feet. Can you just imagine? Wow! 

I really don't have much to say. God is good, and I am still here. So thankful for His goodness!

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under Heaven." ~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

38 Years

Thirty-eight years. That's how long it's been since I had an accident that brought my Chiari symptoms to the forefront. No, the accident did not cause the Chiari; the problem had been there since birth—I just didn't know about it. Because Chiari was relatively new and most doctors didn't even know about it at the time, no one could figure out what was going on. Actually, any doctor I saw thought it was "all in my head." (They really didn't know how accurate that was!)

The Arnold-Chiari Malformation that I have is due to my cerebellum being too far down and reaching into my spinal cord. The cord puts pressure on my brain, causing headaches, double vision, difficulty swallowing, dizziness, neck pain, unsteady gait, weakness, and ringing in my ears. My symptoms began in 1982 as headaches. Other symptoms started appearing a few months later. I went to several different eye doctors and told them about the double vision. At the time, the double vision would mainly occur when I was under a lot of stress. Since you can't schedule stress, they couldn't see it and really didn't believe me. That is, until late 1987 when I was doing my student teaching. I had an eye appointment after an especially stressful day at school. The double vision was so bad that I had to cover one eye to drive. And yes, the doctor finally saw it. He sent me to a neuro-ophthalmologist at UAB. He just "happened" to be doing research on Chiari, so he recognized it immediately. I felt so vindicated! At the time, I was only the 2nd known case in the USA. He sent me to Johns Hopkins for a 2nd opinion. Upon returning, I had surgery to remove a quarter size piece of skull tissue in the back of my head, along with the backs of the top 3 vertebrae to alleviate pressure on my brain. It helped, but I was never asymptomatic. The symptoms began to return, and I had another surgery in 2001. Again, it helped but didn't completely correct the problem. I still have tons of headaches (of course, brain cancer attributes to that too), double vision, and dizziness. I take medication that really helps with the double vision, so that's not really an issue any more.

Thirty-eight years is a long time. I'm tired and just want to go Home. I have headaches every day, but I'd been blessed to have a few weeks of minor headaches. However, that changed Monday. Today is Wednesday, and I've had a really, really bad headache since then. A headache this bad often lasts a week or more. I really covet your prayers. Please enter His Throneroom on my behalf and ask for relief. The pain, along with grieving for my Mama, is relentless. Maybe He's waiting on an army of prayer warriors to intercede along with Him. Please join the troops. I would appreciate it immensely.

Opposite Day

Have you ever played the opposite game? I remember my kids playing it with me. It could get confusing and hilarious all at the same time. Their "yes" became "no" and their "no" became "yes." They almost got in trouble a few times but would yell "Opposite day!"

Well, that's how it is with Christ. The very thing the world expects becomes the opposite. I know you've seen stories of parents forgiving their child's murderer. Pope John Paul II not only forgave his would be assassin (attempted in 1981), but they became friends. After the Pope died in 2005, his attacker truly mourned his death. That's what we do as Christians--the very opposite of what the world expects. Not because of us, but because Jesus did the opposite of what anyone expected. Instead of a crown of gold, He wore a crown of thorns. Not what you would expect from a king. But that's exactly what He is--our King. He died so we could live. The cross was actually His coronation ceremony. How opposite is that!

Sit back, close your eyes, and listen to this song. You certainly have time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xk4xS-95mE

Under the Shelter of His Wings

Wow. I didn't realize it had been so long since I wrote an entry until someone asked me to share my blog with them. For those of you who aren't on Facebook, my apologies!

So much has happened since last summer, which was my last post. We are currently facing a world-wide pandemic that has most of us stuck at home. Honestly, this is how my life is most of the time. I do miss my church family, my kids, and my grandbabies. Peter was born in January and has grown so much already. Yes, we can facetime, but it's definitely not the same. I need to hold him and play with Lucy! Lucy is at such a fun age. We do all kinds of pretend when we're together. Oh, how I miss them! Oh, but I do miss you too David and Rachel. You're kind of special too. 😉

My health is unchanged. I'm still the miracle my doctor said I was! I still have good days and bad days. There are days when the only thing that reminds me that I have cancer is the lack of energy. Sometimes, I feel really good and will do WAY too many things at home. When I do, I'm quickly reminded that I shouldn't be doing that. Oh the fatigue that sets in! Other time, I'm in such pain that I really wish God would just take me Home. Those are days when I don't see a purpose in my continual existence. No worries though. God reminds me that He isn't finished with me yet. Nevertheless, when those thoughts and feelings enter my messed up brain, they are very real. Satan is quite diligent in focusing on making me feel insignificant. But then God... Don't you just love that! The word "but" can be a very loving word!

Today is a good day. I'm experiencing a lot of pain in my neck (no anecdotes, please!🤣), but it isn't excruciating like it so often is. He has me under the shelter of His Wings.

He has us ALL under the shelter of His Wings. Yes, COVID-19 has changed our world, possibly forever. The good news is that He has gotten our attention. So many Christians are being His Hands and Feet. The stories we've seen and experienced have His love written all over them. Who would have thought that an MSNBC anchor would ask a pastor on national TV to pray for us all? Who would have thought that America could ever be basically shut down but so many acts of kindness would occur during the midst of it all? I know Who. The One Who wrote the greatest love story and history book of all time. The One Who loves us even when we're at our absolute worst. The One Who forgives us for even the most heinous of atrocities, if we only ask. The One Who took it all on Himself so we wouldn't have to endure the punishment we so rightly deserve. Do you know this One? Do you know my Jesus? He came as a Baby, but He will soon return as a Conqueror. He will destroy all sin--none of it will be left, including those of us who refuse to turn to Him for forgiveness. Which side will you be on? The Conqueror or the conquered?

"But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD."
~ Joshua 28:15 [emphasis mine]

One more thing. If you haven't read Revelation, read it. If you need help reading it or have questions, ask. I've taught it in my small group for several years but definitely have a lot to learn. One good commentary I've found is on the Through the Word app. Chapter 18 is like reading current events. If you read it and don't see how it's so relevant, ask. It can be a very challenging book to read and understand, but it's oh so worth it. He's coming soon. Are you ready?

My Sweet Mama

My sweet Mama. Oh, how I miss you already! Your love, hugs, sense of humor, and oh what an infectious smile! One thing people would generally say about you was how beautiful your smile was. And your home-cooked meals! Simply nothing like them! No matter how hard I try, I can never replicate those dinners! I could go on and on with the love I have for you. Thankfully, you knew that. Sometimes, when I told you I loved you, you'd say, "no kidding!" I'm just so blessed to know that you are no longer trapped by your body. No more lying in bed, continually staring at the ceiling. Run to Jesus Mama! Say hi to Daddy, Barbara, Ronald, Martin, Mark, Mother and Daddy Vice, and all our family for us. We'll see you soon!

11/04/1922--03/11/2020
You lived your "dash" well!

Outside her apartment at age 89 in 2012

Washing dishes in Michael's kitchen with Daddy being silly 😄

97th Birthday

See you soon Mama!

Entries from 2010

I decided to compile my Facebook posts from 9 years ago when I started having symptoms again through December. It helps me see the progression of my journey and how blessed I am.

February 2, 2010
I don't like my sinuses right now!!

February 13, 2010
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28--It's not easy to understand this sometimes, but it's still true.

March 11, 2010
Home. Sick. Ugh...

March 14, 2010
Better today, but still not quite with the program.

March 27, 2019
need prayer.

April 1, 2010
has laryngitis. For a teacher, that's not good. But praise God it isn't anything worse!
(Oh, the irony...)

April 11, 2010
wonders...
  Added comment after others commented:
   You guys are awesome! Btw, I sound like Mickey Mouse. This laryngitis just won't go away! My kids have been fairly good though! :)

April 21, 2010
went to an ENT today concerning my voice. I can barely talk. He thinks my vocal cords have been strained due to the fact that I was really sick in March. I'm going for tests Monday.

April 26, 2010
had some tests done at the ENT's office. My right vocal cord has had some nerve damage. The left one is compensating, causing my voice to get weaker throughout the day. My doctor said this could last for 6 months or be permanent. Next Thursday, he's going to inject a gel into my vocal cord that should temporarily help and I'll have to repeat every 3 months. He'll have to do something else if this is permanent.

April 29, 2010
"Satan is to God what a mosquito is to an atomic bomb." ~ Max Lucado

May 1, 2010
The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

May 3, 2010
has decided to wait until after school is out to get the injection in my vocal cord. Hopefully, I'll be able to rest it more.

May 7, 2010
God is good!

May 11, 2010
Get behind me Satan!! I don't want you near me any more! I'm tired of you and your demons interfering in my life!

May 12, 2010
Our God is an awesome God. He reigns from Heaven above with wisdom, power, and love. Our God is an awesome God!

May 15, 2010
is sick...again:(

May 19, 2010
has to be at Decatur General tomorrow morning at 8:30 for my gel injection.

May 20, 2010
is home. Everything went well.

May 24, 2010
is audible.

Happy Anniversary to my wonderful husband of 24 years!

May 27, 2010
I'm proud of you son. You did a great job with the youth band. Now Rachel, it's your turn!

May 30, 2010
is blessed!

June 2, 2010
Today has been MUCH better!

June 8, 2010
has been at the court house for jury duty ALL DAY LONG!

June 9, 2010
is finished with jury duty

June 15, 2009
MRI this morning; mammogram and swallow study tomorrow; follow up appointments next Monday; Pray, pray, pray! God is good!

June 17, 2010
In everything give thanks.

June 21, 2010
Here I go again...
  Added comment after others questioned:
   I've got to have more tests. So far, praise God, the results have been normal. But because of the problems I've been having, my oncologist wants to send me for a PET/CT scan Thursday. I also visit a neurologist tomorrow for his opinion. My ENT thinks the neurologist might want to do a CT scan on the right side of my head/neck. And you know how doctors casually mention possible things that could be wrong and that gets stuck in your head. I know that's just the devil messing with my mind.  I'm just tired of all of it and would like to enjoy my summer. It's easy to get down, but the prayers sent up by my friends have made it better. He definitely listens to you guys! And thanks Sherry. I'm kinda proud of those guys! You know how that is!

June 22, 2010
can do all things through Christ who strengthens her.

June 25, 2010
I just returned from my oncologist with the results of my PET/CT scan. There is an abnormality in my left lung and one near my tail bone. I'm having a biopsy Monday at 3:20 in Huntsville to determine whether or not it is cancer. Whatever the outcome, pray most that my response and attitude will glorify God.

June 29, 2010
I wanted to update you concerning my doctor appointment. After examining the PET/CT scans, the doctor feels that my cancer has probably returned. I'm going to be admitted to UAB today so they can do a biopsy and figure out what's going on with my throat and everything else. Please join me as I pray. My God is good, and He will bring me through anything and everything.

July 2 2010
Thank you for your prayers. A CT scan showed abnormalities in my lungs, armpits, and  liver. Doctors wanted to do a biopsy that was least invasive so it took a while to determine where to do it. They were going to do it today, but too many others were scheduled. They sent me home so I wouldn't have to wait over the long weekend. It's scheduled for next Thursday. That just gives everyone more time to pray!

July 5, 2010
"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." --Jesus-Acts 1:8--The Cave Spring youth went to MFuge this week. Be His!

July 6, 2010
"I will trust and not be afraid. The LORD, the LORD is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation." ~ Isaiah 12:2

July 9, 2010
The doctors at UAB are very concerned and feel that the breast cancer has returned. Appointments for biopsies could not be scheduled since my appointment ended late and those that schedule surgery were gone for the day. Our God is awesome. I know you guys are praying. If the doctors are right and it has returned, let this be a time when God can receive complete glory through my healing.

"O LORD you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done marvelous things, things planned long ago." ~ Isaiah 25:1

July 13, 2010
I just found out that my biopsy, called an EBUS, is scheduled for tomorrow morning. I have to be at UAB at 9:00. Thank you for your continued prayers.

I am quite frustrated. My biopsy has been rescheduled for Friday at 10. I've just got to be patient and wait on God's timing.

July 15, 2010
"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." ~ Isaiah 40:31

July 16, 2010
just returned from UAB. There was nothing in the chest area near my lungs to biopsy! Praise God! 1st hurdle over! Now, the doctors had said that there were other areas they wanted to check out. I have an MRI Tuesday on my pelvic area where another abnormality appeared to see if a biopsy is possible there. Keep praying!

July 20, 2010
I saw a breast cancer specialist today. She examined me and doesn't think anything is wrong with my liver! Woo-hoo!! I have a bone scan next week. Keep praying! God is good!!

July 24, 2010
I have a bone scan at UAB Monday morning at 7:30. It should last about 4 hours. I then have an appointment with my oncologist at 12:20 for the results of that and all the tests I had done this week. Keep the prayers going! Thanks guys!

July 26, 2010
I had my bone scan today and doctor's appointment. She's concerned about the scan. I'm going to an orthopedic surgeon Thursday to see if a biopsy of the bone is feasible. If not, I'll probably wait for 8 weeks and have another bone and CT scan to see if the lesions have grown. If they have, I'll probably start chemo again. Once again, I NEED YOUR PRAYERS!!!

July 29, 2010
I just returned from the doctor. They're going to try to biopsy the sacrum, a lower backbone. We just have to wait for precertification from the insurance company before it can be scheduled. Just keep praying, just keep praying! (To the tune of Dori's swimming from Finding Nemo.)

July 31, 2010
"O LORD, You are my God; I will exalt You and praise Your name, for in perfect faithfulness You have done marvelous things, things planned long ago." ~ Isaiah 25:1

August 2, 2010
My biopsy is scheduled for 6:30 Thursday morning at UAB.

August 3, 2010
"Fix these words of Mine in your hearts and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." ~ Deut. 11: 18-19. Thanks Josh Boyd for the reminder of what we as parents should be doing continually.

August 4, 2010
"O LORD, be gracious to us; we long for You. Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress." ~ Isaiah 33:2. His word is so comforting!

August 5, 2010
"For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; ... My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be." ~ Psalm 139: 14-16

August 5, 2010
Thank you everyone for your prayers. I appreciate them SO much! The doctors were able to obtain three tissue samples today. It may be a week before they can tell me anything. Please continue to pray. God has me in the palm of His hands and will take care of me no matter what the outcome. It will be good because it will be His will.

August 6, 2010
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired...and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power to the weak...but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." ~ Is 40:28-31

August 11, 2010
The doctor's office called. My breast cancer has returned. When I find out more about treatments, I'll let you know. God is good and He will take care of me.

August 12, 2010
My first treatment is scheduled for August 27 at 10:30. I have to be there at 9:00 to see the doctor. The treatment itself will take 4-4 1/2 hours.

August 15, 2010
On our way to T-town. David's moving out today. :(

We're back home. David's happy. Yes, I cried.

August 26, 2010
Tomorrow is the 1st. The most difficult part will probably be watching it go into my body. Not looking forward to that. But God will take care of me.

MY DOCTOR'S OFFICE JUST CALLED. A MISTAKE WAS MADE AND I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THERE TOMORROW. I AM NOT HAPPY!!! I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE A TREATMENT UNTIL NEXT THURSDAY!!!

August 27, 2010
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path." ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

August 30, 2010
I'm having a port inserted in my chest Wednesday to make the administration of the chemo easier. It starts Thursday.

September 1, 2010
Port's in. Chemo tomorrow.

September 2, 2010
I'm home. It went well. I'm really tired. Thanks for all your prayers. I really appreciate it. God is good and He will continue to bless.

September 13, 2010
Several of the faculty at my school, Monrovia Elementary, are running in the Liz Hurley Ribbon Run on Saturday, Oct 16 in my honor. If you would like to donate, you can go to http://www.lizhurleyribbonrun.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=435167, click on the MES Hawks team, my name, and then donate if you'd like. I have a treatment on Oct 14 so I probably won't be able to go, but I will if I can.

September 18, 2010
Extra hair in the brush today...

September 22, 2010
Chemo tomorrow. Fun, fun, fun! God is good!

September 23, 2010
God is so good. This is the quote that was on my daily calendar (Max Lucado) this morning. "Hang in there. Your time in the desert will pass. Jesus' did." God is so awesome!!!

Thank you everyone for your prayers. I definitely feel them. God is so good. I got home at about 6 tonight and slept until about 8. Neal woke me up for some chicken noodle soup provided by a sweet friend from school. At this point, I feel better than I did last time. Since I was so fatigued after the last treatment, my doctor decreased the dosage. Join me as I pray I'll feel better and for healing. Love you guys!

September 26, 2010
My new look for church today, 9/26.

October 5, 2010

Back from Gatlinburg. It was awesome! Neal and I did basically nothing. It was wonderful!

October 10, 2010

"I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." ~ Psalm 139:14a. Thank you Brother Jason. I needed to hear that this morning.

October 13, 2010

Treatment tomorrow at 9:30. Fun, fun, fun! Pray, pray, pray!!

October 14, 2010

Home from my treatment. Thanks so much for your prayers. It was a little easier this time. The first week after the treatment has been the toughest so far. Pray that will be easier as well. Tuesday after the treatment has been the toughest day, so pray extra hard Tuesday. God has truly blessed me with you prayer warriors. God has truly blessed me period.

October 16, 2010

Please say an extra prayer for me. I have a lot of trouble sleeping the first few nights after my treatment. This night hasn't been any different.

October 17, 2010

Just got back from the Liz Hurley Ribbon Run. It was awesome! Thanks to all of you who came out to support it or sent prayers. Love you guys!

October 29, 2010
So, David thinks I'm pretty tough. His latest status? "My mom eats cancer for breakfast."

November 2, 2010
I have a treatment Thursday. I will also have a bone and a CT scan done to see if the tumor has shrunk. Pray, pray, pray!

November 4, 2010
I had the scans done and one of my tumors is shrinking (the one my dr is most concerned about) and two are about the same. My doctor was quite pleased. Praise God through Whom all blessings flow! Since the chemo seems to be doing the job, we will continue treatments for a while. I am so blessed! For some reason, He has chosen to use me in this manner. I only hope that I can glorify Him through it all.

November 30, 2010
is getting ready for another treatment on Thursday! Woo-hoo!

December 2, 2010
I'm home. I have three more scheduled and then I'll start receiving Herceptin indefinitely. I've been getting an injection of Herceptin each time. It's sometimes called breast cancer's miracle drug. Had it been available when I was first diagnosed in 98, my doctor said I'd probably been cured. It doesn't cause the side effects that chemo has. And thank you, my sweet sister Marie Bowen for taking me today!

December 5, 2010
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. ~ Rom. 8:26. Thank You for praying for me Holy Spirit. Sometimes I don't know how right now.

December 26, 2010
I have to be at UAB at 8 in the morning for a treatment. Anyone know how the roads are between Priceville and Birmingham?

December 27, 2010
My treatment went well today. My doctor isn't sure now as to how many more chemo treatments I'll have. The next one has been rescheduled for 1/27. I'll have a CT & MRI scan that day as well. She'll use those results to determine if I'll have a few more or several more treatments. It really depends on how the tumors are responding to the treatments. Pray for me. That's not what I wanted to hear.

"You're a miracle."

Today was a good day. Fantastic, actually. I spent it at UAB--not my place of choice, but I received really good news. Neal and I had to be at the Kirklin Clinic by 8:00 for my MRI, followed by blood work, and two different doctor appointments. No, that doesn't sound like a wonderful day, but the final results made it a great day. I saw my breast cancer specialist first. She didn't order the MRI but said she had reviewed it and it looked good to her--no new lesions and everything's stable. She said she had been really worried about me for a while but is extremely happy with how things are going now. Next, I saw my brain cancer specialist. He entered the room and gave me a hug. He's amazed. He said, "I've never had a patient do this well for this long after brain metastasis. You're a miracle."

Yes. God is in the miracle business. I know my faith in Him is key to my recovery. He's the Great Physician and will heal me one way or another. As a matter of fact, I'm already healed. I already have eternal life with Him. Cancer has nothing on my God! I know too that He listens to the prayers of His saints. That's all of you guys! You've faithfully prayed for me and I can't even begin to thank you enough. One day, according to Revelation 5:8, you'll see how He has collected all your prayers like we collect artwork from our kids and grandkids.

On another note, we rescued a dog! Her name is Maggie, and she's already spoiled. Although I love dogs, I was really hesitant about getting one because I was afraid I wouldn't be able to give her the attention she needs when Neal isn't home. However, four years ago, Rachel got a dog that we kept a lot and I realized that I could. We don't keep Josie much any more and Rachel really encouraged me to get one of my own. She's been so good for me! And yes, I love her to pieces. Check out the pics.

"The righteous care for the needs of their animals." ~ Proverbs 12:10a
(See! There's a verse for everything! 😊)

Rescued!

Play time!

Hallelujah to the Great I AM!!